My pastor gave a good sermon yesterday from Philippians. One of his points was about having a purpose. I realized that I’m a little short on purpose these days.
A few years ago I realized that my purpose was lodged in being a teacher. If I could do my life over I would probably be a professor of Bible at some small university, even though I’m kind of glad I didn’t get into the jungle of academia.
But I’ve been fairly good at teaching the Bible in classes and groups associated with the church. I loved doing that.
Then I got sick.
My cancer makes me tired and makes me quite undependable to keep any kind of regular schedule. I had to stop making teaching commitments. During the treatment phase, I was totally unable to take on any responsibilities. Once we determined that treatments were unsuccessful and went into the watch and wait phase, I have been more stable but still fairly variable and undependable.
So, I’m trying to figure out what to do. It seems important to me to have some kind of purpose. I don’t want to give up being useful altogether.